Turistas (2006)

August 23, 2012

"You'll be dying to stay."

Alex (Josh Duhamel) is accompanying his sister Bea (Olivia Wilde) and her best friend Amy (Beau Garrett) for their first time abroad –- young Americans who have come to exotic Brazil for fun, adventure and the promise of foreign pleasures. On a rickety bus rocketing up a twisting mountain road, they meet Pru (Melissa George), the only one among them who speaks the native language Portuguese, and Finn and Liam (Desmond Askew and Max Brown), who just want to experience for themselves the beautiful Brazilian women they've heard so much about. But when their driver loses control and they are lucky to escape with their lives, the new friends find their way to a cabana bar on a nearby beach where a party is just getting started. A hazy night of exotic liquors and sensuous dancing later, they wake up alone, their possessions gone, and only the faintest traces of the nightmare to come on their lips. Their anger turns to fear as they are led farther and farther from the possibility of escape. A dark secret waits for them in the lush jungle and underground caverns of the Brazilian mountains, and the more they try to escape it the deeper they are driven into a nightmare of human hunting and unspeakable crimes, where they must fight a primal battle for their lives in the most terrifying of all human traps.

I've always been a Hostel lover, no matter how crappy it is. I've been seeking for this movie, Turistas as everyone mostly mentioned it to be (somehow) better than Hostel, with mostly the same formulas; tourists (mostly Americans), having their vacation until they're trapped in one crappy building and get their internal organ taken/torn away. And of course, with boobs and vodkas added. After watching, I can conclude that this movies is no better than Hostel, but (yes) as worst as Hostel (though Hostel still entertains me with its disgusting tortures). Director John Stockwell doesn't do any good in this movie. It's far too predictable (in any seconds, you'll know who'll survive as well as the far too common storyline). There's no necessary twist, no character developments and fairly dissapointing ending. It's like those (stupid) efforts and far-too-long-and-no-intention journey are just a waste of time. And the actors and actresses? I adore none of them in terms of quality but beauty.

Turistas does come up with few unique things. First, it offers more suspense but less gore (but , the 'suspense' itself doesn't do any harm into my breath). Second, it represents Brazil as the least attractive place to visit (the tourism board will seriously be mad), with all of those slumps, thieves and scary locals who unfortunately hate Americans. Third, the scene when Amy's internal organs are being lifted up by the crazy doctor Zamora, then he placed her organs on between her bare breasts; it's disgusting, disturbing and super violent.

Bottom line, as the tagline says "Go Home", if only I watched it at cinema, I certainly would do so.

Zamora : "Did you know that in America there is a seven-year wait for a healthy kidney? And in Europe it's worse. So if a rich gringo needs a kidney, what does he do? Wait and get sick like the rest of us? No. He comes here to Brazil to take advantage of our bounty and of our poverty."


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